The experience seems to vary for everyone. Some had times they were free from sexual immorality of all sorts for weeks, months, even years. But then came back to it. While others find themselves hopping in and out of one sexual immoral act or the other.
There may even be some who have fallen in and out so much that they concluded in their minds that it is something they just must accept as part of who they are.
Sexual immorality could be a thorn in the flesh. It is never unusual to have a thorn in the flesh even as a believer because in 2 Corinthians 12:7 Apostle Paul mentioned that there was given to him a thorn in the flesh. He never mentioned what exactly the thorn was but the most important thing is that such a man whose God’s power and revelation flowed through heavily never denied his own thorn and he was not ashamed of it.
To have a thorn in the flesh is never a strange thing, and most of the time, it is always an opportunity for the glory of God to shine through.
The word of God is the greatest arsenal for fighting and winning battles is filled with weapons that are meant to help believers win overwhelming battles like sexual immorality.
Truth be told, sexual immorality and lust, in general, is not the easiest of battles to win, but it is never an impossibility to be free from it. It is something that can be done by you through God’s Spirit.
Whatever form of sexual immorality you might currently find yourself indulging in. No matter how long it has been, there is always a way out because there are practical steps founded on the word of God that can help you overcome sexual immorality and I want to share those step with you below.
Seven Practical Step You Can Take Now To Wriggle Your Way Out Of Sexual Impurity
1. Turn it over to the Lord:
Every battle becomes easier when it is turned over to the Lord. Trying to overcome sexual immorality in our own way, by our own strength is a burdensome approach and often ends in futility and frustration.
The word of God says in Zechariah 4:6, It is “not by might, nor by power, but by my spirit, says the LORD of hosts”
As believers, we are meant to turn burdens like masturbation, pornography, lustful thoughts, or any sort of sexual immorality to the Lord. This does not mean we do not get to take action ourselves. It only means that submitting and turning things over to the Lord is a sign that we cannot do it by our own strength, and this gives room for the Holy Spirit to work through us, guide us, and lay further actions that will make us free in our hearts.
2. Eliminate Triggers:
After turning things over to the Lord and submitting to the guidance of his Spirit, one critical action on our path to take is to eliminate triggers that prompt us towards sexual immorality of any kind.
Jesus said in Matthew 5:29 (NIV) “If your right eye causes you to sin, poke it out and throw it away. Your eye is only one part of your body. It is better to lose an eye than for your whole body to be thrown into hell.”
Jesus is not saying we literally poke out our eyes here. When it comes to sexual immorality there are often things that trigger lustful thoughts and then actions.
The ‘right eye’ here for you could be videos, friends, contacts, or social media platforms that constantly post sexually related contents that could trigger a chain of thoughts that might want to end up in you engaging in one immoral act or the other. Whatever your ‘right eye’ is the biblical command is to poke it out.
3. Pray and start thinking differently:
Jesus said in Mark 9:23 “Everything is possible for the one who believes.”. Also, in Mark 11:24 (NIV) “So I tell you, when you pray for something, believe that you have already received it. Then it will be yours”
Many believers have been drowning in all sorts of sexual immorality for years. They have battled with it for such a long time that they have concluded in their hearts that it is an insurmountable mountain to climb.
That is nothing but a lie. The word of God says “…if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there,’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you.”—including overcoming sexual sin!
Prayer is the key to all things. It closes and opens doors. 1 John 5:14 (NIV). “This is the confidence we have in approaching God: that if we ask anything according to his will, he hears us.”
Dear reader, it is the will of God for you to be free from sexual immorality no matter how bad it has held you down and kept you feeling powerless. Most believers feel ashamed to talk to God about their problems with sexual immorality. This is understandable but it is always God’s heart’s desire to help, and we can always ask for his help through prayers. Sexual immorality could be a delicate subject to discuss and that’s understandable, but God is not man. He does not judge you because your sin does not surprise Him.
Also, it does not stop at praying to God. You must start thinking differently from there onward. Proverbs 23:7 (KJV) “For as he thinks in his heart so is he…”. Once you have prayed, there is a need for you to now let go of thoughts that suggest, agree with, or confirms to you that you are still a believer struggling with sexual immorality. If you hold on to such thoughts, you will remain what your thoughts suggest to you that you are.
On the other hand, if you start to think of yourself as an individual who is already free from sexual immorality, you will start to see the fruits of having and holding on to such positive thoughts in your life from that point on.
4. Pick Yourself Up:
The truth about wriggling free from sexual immorality is that it is a journey. If at some point of your journey you find yourself having lustful thoughts or anything related to sexual immorality pick yourself up always.
Self-control and killing the flesh is a fight to the death. The flesh cannot bring itself into subjection. Only the spirit can. Apostle Paul in 1 Corinthians 9:27 mentioned how he keeps his body under subjection. He goes on about this same topic in Romans 7:23 (NIV) “but I see another law at work in me, waging war against the law of my mind and making me a prisoner of the law of sin at work within me.”
All these clearly explain how Apostle Paul had fleshly desires, he never mentioned what they were exactly, but clearly, there were fleshly desires.
This is not an encouragement for you to indulge in sexual immorality as a believer but to let you understand that you are not the first to have lustful or fleshly desires. If at all you are lured away and fall into sin at some point, pick yourself up, pray to God for forgiveness and like Paul keep working with the Holy Spirit to bring your body into subjection.
One good way to bring the body into subjection is by fasting. Why fasting? Fasting involves denying yourself food— an everyday desire of the flesh. By denying yourself food, you first get your flesh uncomfortable. Not only that, fasting for the purpose of bringing the flesh into subjection brings you closer to God. It also opens your heart, mind, and body to the Holy Spirit to take more control over you, your mind, and your decisions from then on regarding sexual immorality and this often results in having more control over your flesh.
5. Diet and exercise:
The word of God says in 1 Corinthians 6:19 that “your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit”. Through scientific research, we have been able to understand that what we eat, how we eat, and how we use our body affects our overall functioning.
Apart from the guilt and shame that comes with sexual immorality, more than anything it destabilizes the chemical makeup of the body, especially the brain. Our lifestyle plays a crucial role in the functioning of the body system. For example, exercise helps release dopamine to the brain which gives the same ‘feeling of reward’ that addictive immoral acts like masturbation and watching pornography releases to the brain. Only that these immoral acts give one a false sense of satisfaction and the never-ending desire for more.
Overeating for instance causes one to feel heavy and this can lead to craving dopamine through immoral means like masturbation.
God has allowed science research to attain this point of discovery for a lot of reasons and living a better lifestyle free of sexual immorality is definitely one of them.
6. Engage yourself meaningfully:
Matthew 6:21(NIV) “For where your treasure is, there your heart will be also.”
To engage in any sexual immoral act, you need the time and to have that time you must create it. Now you imagine a life that is structured to engage in meaningful and positive actions. A life where your treasure is not in a place of temporary pleasure but one where your heart is constantly thinking about pleasing the Lord with every of your thoughts and actions. A life where your heart is constantly meditating on the word of God like Joshua 1:8 encourages us to do.
That life is very much possible, and you can create such a life for yourself. A life that leaves you with no thought or room for negative actions like engaging in immoral activities.
7. Guard Your Heart:
“Guard your heart above all else, for it determines the course of your life.” — Proverbs 4:23 (NLT)
Consciously guarding your heart might just be the ultimate step towards becoming free from lust and sexual immorality. Why? we are thinking, feeling, and doing beings. This means before we can do anything, we need to think about it, feel like doing it, before eventually getting to do it at all.
To have reasonable control over your actions or your life as a believer, there is a great need to have control over your thoughts. As a believer, the word of God should be the shepherd of your thoughts. Having a shield over your heart where thoughts stream out from is a crucial step to take towards becoming free from any immoral addiction.
The shield in this case is the word of God. Every thought (that, in turn, leads to action) should be guided by the word of God. The word of God should be what you meditate on at every given opportunity.
When this crystallizes as part of your life, you will experience massive reduction and then extinction of feeling or wanting to engage in any form of sexual immorality.
When you make it a part of you to guard your heart against housing any lustful thought by constantly keeping the word of God as a guard over your heart, the feeling, or the urge to engage in any immoral act becomes naturally difficult and almost impossible.
Having a shield over your heart is a great step towards becoming free from any immoral act. The shield is not what you build or develop in a flash. It is a thing you build through repetition, desire, and willpower also through keeping his word firm in your heart and with the help of the Holy Spirit.
The path that leads towards freedom in regards to sexual immorality is not the easiest of paths. You might stumble, feel like giving in, or be tempted to accept it as your fate and something you must live with for the rest of your life. One thing, or rather one truth that is worth holding on to is the fact that being a slave to your flesh and lustful desires is never God’s plan for you as a believer. Like the loving God that He is, He wants to help you to be free and He will hold you by the hand through the journey towards freedom.
Maybe you are in your beginning stages or have been fighting for years and feel stuck in your battle against sexual immorality but want to continue your journey towards freedom. Faithfully practice all these 7 steps to the best of your ability, and above all, have faith in God that He will help you overcome by the power of His Spirit as you yield yourself to Him and for His purposes.
If you feel the need in your heart to further discuss the obstacles that you are experiencing regarding sexual immorality or any other challenge that life is throwing at you, then take a moment to reach out to me for Biblical Counseling by CLICKING HERE to get started!
It will be a privilege and an honor to walk with you and share encouragement from the Word of God that will help fast-track you on your journey to freedom.
By: Angelo Shamoon
Updated on April 2021